"HEAVEN'S MANDATE " SCREENPLAY EXCERPT

I'm posting for the heck of it a scene from a screenplay I completed for a winter UCLA screenwriting class.

It's titled "Heaven's Mandate." Storyline: A Chinese Joan of Arc with a mystic sword sacrifices all to save her homeland and thwart a power-mad noblewoman from becoming empress of China.

Think a Chinese Joan of Arc fighting for righteousness with a magic sword or "Gladiator" & "Braveheart" going to China, where they meet "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon."

I've sent this script to a UCLA script competition. The top 5 receive a small cash reward, there are five honorable mentions, and all ten get their names and story summaries printed in film trade journals.

I entered the script to see how it fares with competition. If it places within the top ten and I get calls from agents, managers, and producers who want to see the script, I'll send it out and see what happens.

[Note: Since this posting, I received word that my script was a winner in the 2005-2006 UCLA Screenplay Competition. Woohoo! See my UCLA Screenplay Contest Win post.]

I may likely market this script with a Hong Kong studio instead because they deal in this genre more.

When reading a script, it's more like a blue print for the director who shoots the scenes and the actors who play them out. The audience will never read the script, just see the film on screen. A reader can't get into the characters' heads like in fiction. We know the characters by what they say and do. Character descriptions are a bit more general in order to give casting people a wider variety of actors to look for and are used more to give actors a sense of who the characters are.

Enjoy the excerpt:
[Note: Format not saved by blog software. :-/]
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EXT. REBEL ARMY HEADQUARTERS -- DAY

The ORGANIZED CHAOS of an army cleaning up a field of battle
runs rampant: litter bearers carrying wounded, prisoners
being rounded up, regiments taking roll, etc.

IMPERIAL YELLOW DRAGON BANNERS stake out a council of war in
the storm of activity.

Chinese, Khitan, and Turkish officers in gilded lamellar
armor stand clustered around AN LUSHAN, mid 40s, who leans
over a table littered with maps and other documents.

Half Turk, half Iranian, Lushan looks every bit the seasoned
military man--

Lushan shakes the table with a clenched fist.

(Note: All dialogue is in Mandarin Chinese with English
subtitles.)

LUSHAN
How fortunate it is for Captain Wu
to be up in the mountains, else he'd
be short a head now.

A CHINESE CAPTAIN speaks up.

CHINESE CAPTAIN
Captain Wu's division held up the
advance of the entire enemy right
wing before breaking...

Lushan shoots him a withering look.

CHINESE CAPTAIN
(faster)
Surely he can be excused.

A TURKISH CAPTAIN offers his support.

TURKISH CAPTAIN
Captain Wu's action did lend us enough
time to pierce the enemy center and
rout him from the field.

LUSHAN
I suppose...

Lushan looks up as a squad of soldiers escorting Ching and
Seng approaches his council.

The women, their hair tied in topknots, wear dull-colored
tunics and breeches. Ching wears the straight-bladed jian
sword Heavenglaive strapped to her back. Seng wields a long
staff.

LUSHAN
(to sergeant)
I said I wasn't to be disturbed.
The women can entertain the officers
later.

The SERGEANT bows. His face and those of his men are bruised.

SERGEANT
(uncomfortable)
These honorable women are nuns from
Shaolin.

Everyone's attention focuses on Ching and Seng.

CHING
Our master would be displeased to
learn you delegated us to the duties
of camp followers, Governor-general
An.

Both women bow.

CHING
I am Fa Ching.

SENG
Li Seng. Please accept the service
of two humble nuns.

Lushan studies Ching with new concentration.

LUSHAN
(tightly controlled)
You are all your master sent?

SENG
(low)
Not willingly--

Ching silences Seng with a quick look.

CHING
We are volunteers.

The officers talk among themselves.

CHINESE CAPTAIN
These are the famous cudgel monks?

TURKISH CAPTAIN
Cudgel maidens, more like.

CHINESE CAPTAIN
I'm up for some swordplay.

KHITAN CAPTAIN
Why only two?

LUSHAN
I see your master has a sense of
humor. He could've simply requested
a larger temple donation by letter.
(beat)
Go back to Shaolin, little girls...
Better yet go home and find yourselves
good farmers to look after you.
You're no Monk Biancheng or
Monk Yuekong.

Lushan gestures to the squad of soldiers to lead Ching and
Seng away.

A beat as the soldiers eye each other nervously, then point
their spears and swords at the women --

Ching slashes several nearby spear points off with one swipe
of her sword. Seng covers her back.

KHITAN CAPTAIN
A tiger-demon!

CHING
No, we are Nun Ching and Nun Seng.
Would the governor-general care to
test our quality?

Lushan draws his DAO SWORD, a saber with a broad, curved
blade.

LUSHAN
I've an edge to work off.